|Beautiful You: A Novel
"Even as Penny was attacked, the judge merely stared. "
"A billion husbands are about to be replaced."
From the author of Fight Club, the classic portrait of the damaged contemporary male psyche, now comes this novel about the apocalyptic marketing possibilities of female pleasure. Sisters will be doing it for themselves. And doing it. And doing it. And doing it some more . . . Penny Harrigan is a low-level associate in a big Manhattan law firm with an apartment in Queens and no love life at all. So it comes as a great shock when she finds herself invited to dinner by one C. Linus Maxwell, aka "Climax-Well," a software mega-billionaire and lover of the most gorgeous and accomplished women on earth. After dining at Manhattan's most exclusive restaurant, he whisks Penny off to a hotel suite in Paris, where he proceeds, notebook in hand, to bring her to previously undreamed-of heights of orgasmic pleasure for days on end. What's not to like? This: Penny discovers that she is a test subject for the final development of a line of sex toys to be marketed in a nationwide chain of boutiques called Beautiful You. So potent and effective are these devices that women by the millions line up outside the stores on opening day and then lock themselves in their room with them and stop coming out. Except for batteries. Maxwell's plan for erotically enabled world domination must be stopped. But how?
Reviewing this is going to be HARD, really HARD, super rock HARD, throbbing rock HARD. Blushing yet? You will be after you read this. All you folks who read "Fifty Shades" and thought it was "so naughty" better not pick this book up... you might DIE from the lack of constraint Palahniuk uses. Just like all of Chuck's books, this should have warning labels slapped all over it. As the saying goes... if you don't have the stomach for it, get out of the kitchen?!? (Okay, that might not be the exact saying, but it works).
Right away, reading the description, we know this book is centered around sex, sex, more sex and sex toys. Nobody should be reviewing this book in shock about the subject matter, clearly if they do... they don't know Chuck very well. I almost want to say this book was made as a response to those who thought "Fifty Shades" so taboo (because it sure seemed like a complete farce of that book) but I think the intention was only to brushed upon it. This book is in NO way a better written copy but Palahniuk does include quite a few hysterical jabs here and there. Suck it, E.L. James! (which is what I imagine Chuck saying while writing this book). A friend of mine, Shane T. French (amazing/talented and up-and-coming graphic novel/comic writer), has brought it to my attention that Chuck Palahniuk waited until his parents died in order to write and publish this book. Nice little fact, one that gives you a better idea of what you'd be faced reading if you pick this one up.
P.S. - Guess who has tickets to see Palahniuk in Brooklyn, NY on HALLOWEEN? Yep, both Arianna and I do. Stay tuned for that event post (as long as I can sit still enough to take notes).
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Left: Hardcover -- Right: EBook